Is this be Family leave retaliation?

I work in the state of California. I recently took three weeks off to care for my wife as she is having a very troublesome pregnancy. Her doctor completed the standard fmla certification form that I was given by my employers. The doctor certified the necessity that I accompany my wife during treatment and periods of discomfort. An approximate 6 week block of time was specified on that form and I only took three.. Later in the pregnancy she had more of the same complications and I took two additional weeks intermittently (over about 4 months). Due to a management change, that time wasnt authorized as part of the fmla. (the new management wants me to bring a doctor's note for each of those days. They misplaced all the prior paperwork, including the original fmla form). A "letter of disciplinary action" was added to my employment record for excessive absences by the new management during our first fmla meeting.
I have a little more intermittent time I'll need to take.
There was a four day period during which time I took my wife to a specialist about 450 miles away (this was during that second intermittent two weeks).
I was required to bring back a note from the doctor for each day. (this was the same specialist that filled out the original fmla form). However, knowing that I was going to be out for 4 days, they required me to call in every morning. On the third morning I was informed that my absence was not authorized and would be classified as a "no call, no show" (AWOL). putting my job very much in peril. I was told that "I had a choice to make", and they expected me back that afternoon.

I have been called in about 8 times since then for long and very stressful meetings in which they (management) try various forms of pressure to either "find someone else to take care of my wife", or quit so that someone else can move into my job position. The senior manager even told me that "when her husband was dying for two years, she took little to no time off".
Now they require that I bring a doctor's note for each and every absence, scheduled or otherwise.
While this is clearly more of the same kind of pressure. And not very nice. My question is; are they violating the law?
I have been so uptight and anxious at work because of this whole thing, I can barely function. Who wants to be somewhere their not wanted. And reminded every day of how much better things would be if I left and let them hire someone that will be there all the time.